"C" Is For...

... Cancer. It's unfortunate, really, morbid in fact, to be the one and only astrological sign that shares its name with an illness which is, the majority of the time, terminal. It's a big bummer, to be frank.

I mean, there are no other astrological signs that are synonymous with a deadly disease. It's quite unfair, if you think about it. No one ever says, in a quiet tone, "she died from Aries," or Scorpio, or Taurus. No, not related to something morbid at all, those signs. If anyone happened to suddenly die, then at least, one could proudly say that he or she simply had an ill-fated infatuation with someone of another astrological sign, and it would be death categorized in the from love (or unrequited love), and that would be quite romantic.

But, oh! To be a "Cancer." The term, since the word refers to other ills (the obvious- cancer: a disease which materializes within the body and eats away at the body's tissue until it can no longer operate - and the less obvious - the metaphorical nomiker "cancer," in which a person is considered to be clingy and suffocating, or one who spreads negativity), does not ring lightly or cheerily in human ears, whether speaking of signs or not. It is loaded with negativity; so much so that I often refrain from referencing it when describing myself.

But here's the funny thing. Cancer, the sign that is, is the one most identifiable thing about me. Now, don't take me for some hippie-dippy astrology freak. I'm just saying that, in my three decades on the earth, only my family origin and my astrological sign have made me feel real, definable, and understood. So what I'm saying is that, of the few things I can solidly rely on to come back to my true... my true... "soul identity" I guess I'll call it, is something for which the majority of the world cringes upon hearing when uttered. Cancer.

On that note and on a somewhat half-baked tangent, I want to know something. I want to know something about the questions doctors and researchers ask people who have been identified as having lung cancer yet have never smoked. Because I seriously think it has a lot to do with all the consumer product shit that we either have and swear by or are being forced to believe is required for "cleanliness."

So, here are my questions that I hope to God the reasearchers and doctors are asking, so we can eliminate possible cancer enducers in the future. If they are not asking them yet, I hope someone reads this and passes it along:

Where do you live (I have a feeling most of these cases are in US or highly industry-related cities)?
Recall to the best of your ability what brand of foods did you eat as a child?
Recall to the best of your ability what cleaning brands/products your family used when you were growing up?
Recall to the best of your ability what brand of pesticides, herbicides, plant food products, pest control products, mosquito repellent, etc your family used habitually?
Name the major brands and products of foods that you have consistently eaten in the last 5 years.
Name the brands of cleaning products you have conisistenly used in the last 5 years.
Name the pesticides, herbicides, plant food products, pest control products, mosquito repellents etc you have used in the last 5 years.
Do you drink coffee, soda, tea, and in what quantities daily
What percentage of your diet is made up of processed food, including items such as homogenized milk products (cheese, butter, milk) and fortified bread products?
Do you consume any products that are replacements ("artificial") for other products, such as CoffeeMate, Equal, Egg Beaters, etc.
Do you use aerosole chemical products of any sort in your home?

OK, I am thinking now that my list could go on and on and soon enough, I would start a grassroots organization in which the constituents would be 250 times more invested in than me. But I think you get my drift: non-smoking lung cancer makes absolutely no sense. Something is happening here, and I think, once again, it can be pinned on our infamous private sector, which is attempting to make a fortune on making our lives easier by introducing products that destroy not only us but our world. Exponentially, it seems.

And so now, with this teeny bit of extremism that I have introduced (yet another one of my "lovely" Cancerian characteristics), you can see how I get all bent out of shape by being a Cancer. Can't you?

Tags:

• life
• funny
• ironic
• astrology